Pirates 3

So Sean emailed everyone on my behalf to demand that they go see Pirates 3 with me on my night off. He said basically that I didn't listen to critics - I liked bad movies - and that I would see anything with Johnny Depp - I am man hungry.

I really love Sean but I am concerned with his opinion of me.

Of course I did want to see Pirates 3 so we went. Thus my review. I'll avoid spoilers as Martika may not have seen it.

Two Words: over indulgent. Or is that one word?

I really, really, really enjoyed Jack's hallucinations. Less for the naughty implications and more for the amusement.

I disliked that I kept thinking that for the amount of money that was spent on this very long movie, we could buy Mt. Vernon or maybe cure cancer.

Captain Barbosa kicks ass. He suddenly became the greatest character.

I could really care less about Will and Elizabeth. The ending was a little too sappy. Sean could attest to my snorts and moans during those scenes. But it wasn't to the point of physical discomfort as say those scenes in Episode 2.

The Singapore scenes were cool. Setting wise, this was the best of the 3.

Keith Richards kind of scares me.

It's cute how they maintain the background characters in all three movies. And more of the minor people got more screen time in this one. (It was 3 hours long. )

Seriously, there is a pirate benetton.

Overall, the movie was ok. It was too long but not Titanic living hell long. And all those really apparent clever plot twists aren't that unpredictable so...it dragged. But I love the Captain Jack yet I am not man hungry.

7/10

Scrubs Season Finale

Scrubs

John Dorian must die. Painfully. If they are picked up for season 7, I wish that every episode could be centered around the painful torture and eventual physical destruction of John Dorian.

No, he is not cute or a sympathetic character. He is self center and self serving.

Kim is finally back and only a month away from giving birth to his monster child. She would have done better not seeing him ever again. No, I don't sympathize with men who can't handle being a father and run away from commitment.

The episode ends with J.D. and Elliot in the on-call room moments away from kissing and self destructing their relationships - again. They both deserve to burn for hurting the people that care about them.

2/10.

The Office Season Finale

The Office

I love, love, love the Office. No one dies. No is mean to pregnant women. Just silly laughs. :)

Jan has lost her job in corporate despite her new fake breasts and Micheal competes with Karen, Jim and Ryan for her job. Micheal decides to go back with Jan's new breasts despite that Jan herself demeans him - good for him - but is now out of the running.

For the people who actually care about Jim/Pam/Jam, it looks like they have a chance now that he left Karen in New York without any notice. Yeah, he's a real good boyfriend. Good luck with that, Pam.

But the best moment, Ryan gets Jan's job. Next season, Micheal will be answering to the temp. And finally, finally Ryan is done with Kelly.

8/10

Lost Season Finale

Lost Season Finale

What the freakin hell. As I've said numerous times this season: the episode that Charlie dies in will be the last episode of Lost I watch, ever. I'm done. Besides his death being pointless and contrived there are characters that deserve death more. Such as:

1. Jack. Oh my freaking god does Jack need to die. He's whiney and is now castrated thanks to Juliette. I would actually rather undergo a lobotomy than watch another scene with past/present/future Jack.
   
2. Locke. Did we forget that he killed Boone? He has made more mistakes on the island than anyone else and is always forgiven.
3. Michael. He has been absent this season but he did sell the other Losties out for the exchange of Walt and their supposed freedom. And hey, Walt's still on the island so we know that didn't work out so well.
   
4. Bernard. I'm sorry, he's still a part of Wolfram and Hart. He is not to be trusted.
   
5. Any of the Others except for Batmanuel.

Ok, so it was a good episode expect for when Charlie died needlessly. Hurley kicked major ass and so did Sawyer. Maybe I wouldn't feel so pissed at the Lost writers if Charlie died for a reason to further the plot. But no, the writers backed themselves into a corner and I'm assuming poor little Dom was bored out his mind in Hawaii.

If anyone wants my season 1 Lost dvds, please let me know. I will be happy to freecycle them.

-1000000/10